LiTeRaTUrE BLooPeRs by Brownielocks and The 3 Bears

Anonymous is the name of the man who writes all the poems that are not signed?

Hera had only one way to control Zeus and viewed sex as a means of coming to an end.

Vesta was a goddess who kept the home fries burning. Dionysius was the god of rivalry. Bacchus first taught the Greeks to get drunk. The messenger god was named herpe, while the god of metalworking was Hepatitus. Persephone was a girl who hd an on-and-off relationship with Pluto.

Odysseus is one of many heroes in ancient iniquity. While Odysseus is off sleeping with goddesses, Penelope has to stay at home and beat off all those suitors. When Odysseus comes home in disguise, his old nurse recognizes him by his scared thigh, which he gets from a wild bore. Odysseus has to sail between Scylla and Charybdis. Being between Scylla and Charybdis means that which ever way you go, you are going to get got.

Sophocles wrote the famous Greek play Oedipus Wrecks. Oedipus screws up very badly when he marries his own mother who was really his wife, which the Erkel knew it all along. Oedipus forces out his eyes and condoms himself. Oedipus and Hamlet really had a lot in common, even if Freud had not yet been invented.

The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William J. shakespeare. Shakespeare was born in the eyar 1564, supposedly on his birthday. His father was Mr. Shakespeare, and his mother was Mrs. Shakespeare. He wrote during the era in which he lived. Actually, Shakespeare wasn't written by Shakespeare but by another man named Shakespeare.

Shakespeare never made much money and is famous only because of his play and sonics. He lived at Windsor with his merry wives, writing hysterectomies, tragedies, comedies and errors. I don't see why he is so popular when his writing skills are so low. He wrote in Islamic pentameter, and you can't hardly understand what he is saying.

In one of Shakespeare's famous plays, Hamlet rations out his situation by relieving himself in a long sililoquy. A soliloquy is a conversation between one person. Hamlet has an edible complex, and his mind is filled with the filth of incestuous sheets which he pours over every time he sees his mother. Hamlet decides to act madly so he gets in an antic position. In Act Five, Hamlet talks to Horatio about a skull that has been thrown up. Active Five comes right after Act Four.

In another play, Macbeth was from his mother's womb untamely ripped. He is a brave and strong man who turns bad and gradually gets worse.

King Duncan wires MacBeth that he will be spending the night at his castle. Then Lady Macbeth tries to convince Macbeth to kill King Duncan by attacking his manhood. All Macbeth does is follow his wife's odors. He kills the king on Page 14. Macbeth and Lady Macbeth then suffer from quilt. In fact, they have so much quilt, they can't sleep at night.

During the banquet scene, Lady Macbeth is afraid her husband will expose himself in front of his guests. Then Lady Macbeth gets kilt. The proof that the witches in Macbeth were supernatural is that no one could eat what they cooked.

Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couplet. This story presents a one on one situation between a man and a woman. Romeo and Juliet belonged to the families of the Montages and Copulates. They tell each other how much they are in love in the baloney scene. After much fighting in the pubic square, Romeo's last wish is to be laid by Juliet.

In Julius Caesar, Brutus is a tragic hero despite dying at the end. Caesar is murdered by the Ides of March because they think he is going to be made king. Dying, he gasps out the words, "tee hee, Brutus." Then he dies with these immortal words, "Veni, Vedi, vici."

In the Merchant of Venice, the Rialto is the business part of Venus. Bassanio loved Portia, but he had no money to press his suit. Taming of the Screw is a play bout Petruchio, who takes Kate from a bitter screw to an obdient wife. The clown in As You Like It is named Touchdown. In that play, Shakespeare wrote, "All the world's a stage, and everyone is just acting."

In Anthony and Cleopatra, Cleopatra reclined to become Mark Anthony's mistress. She took the Roman Empire one man at a time. The barge she shat on, like a burnished throne, glowed on the water. The poop was beaten gold.

Several of Herrick's poems use the tradition of crape diem. In "To the Virgins, to Make Much of Time," Herrick warns that if they do not loosen up, they will not have any friends. Being a virgin is OK for people who are old, like teachers and parents, and who do not want to be popular. But this poem is telling us to have some fun now so that we can die with a smile on our face.

Many of the poems in this section have a basic theme of death, which was quite common in the times of Romantic literature. Not even the dust of Ozymandias' remains remains.

Edgar Allen Poe was a very curdling write. He had several dditions. One of his additions was alcohol. Poe was a very sad man. Because he was such a sad man, h wrote very sad stories. The reason he was so sad is that he was impudent. Because he was impudent, he could never love a woman. He could only love little girls. He married a little girl, but he was impudent, so they never had any children.

Mr. Murdstone treated David Copperfield's Mother like a very terranical mail shovenist.

When Arthur Dimmesdale felt guilt about his sin in The Scarlet Letter, he felt better when he went on the scaffold and relieved himself.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow was born in Portland, Maine, while his parents were traveling abroad.

In The Mayor of Casterbridge, when Henchard sold his wife to another man, their marital relationship was not healthy.

Willie Loman was nver more than an average salesman, and people didn't remember him for miles around. Willy Loman's suicide at the end of Death of a Salesman, by Author Miller, leads him to think there is a better way of life.

In A Streetcare Named Desire, the climax is when Blanche goes to bed with Stella's husband. At the end, Blanche goes to a mental instituion, where she discovers what life is really like.

Lord of the Flies is a story about a bunch of boys on an uninhibited desert island.

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